[Song of the post] That's Your Horoscope for Today - Weird Al
Well, it's almost exams, and I can't believe I'm blogging. Oh well, it's just a couple of lists.
Signs that you've done one too many 长文缩短:
- You read your 理解问答 until the 130th word, then after that, for every ten words you start minusing marks.
- Your speech comprises of not more than 130 words, and is very concise and to the point.
- You start missing articles such as 'the' and 'a'.
- You start cancelling out words in the instructions.
- Your 作文 stops at 130 words.
Bad excuses for cheating in your exam:
- The guy next to me was doing it as well!
- Cheating? I wasn't cheating. Looking at someone elses paper isn't cheating. It's copying.
- Yeah, I was cheating, yeah. Oh look, there's a flying pig! And George Bush is parachuting into that warehouse wearing a pink tutu...
- So what? You got a problem with that?
- But sir, you were looking at my paper too...
- HEY! LOOK OVER THERE!
- The only thing I copied was his name.
- I'm not insured against failing tests.
- Why? You trying to cheat for your paper as well? Well, go copy someone else!
- There wasn't a handy photocopier nearby.
You've been studying too hard for your physical science exam when:
- You know every atomic number for every element.
- You have the word 'Proton' on the back of your shirt because you want to keep a positive attitude.
- You love the letters PSC even if you were in the Public Speaking Competition.
- You dream about trucks with corrosive liquid crashing into bridges and spilling its contents into rivers.
- You find alkalis to be a very basic topic.
- Instead for solving in maths, you dissolve.
- You have to alkali down after studying.
- You can verify the pH level of anything just by touch.
- You must have balance in your life.
- You don't use the word OK anymore because you know the real chemical formula is K2O.
Signs that you been studying way too much:
- You haven't slept in three days.
- You have the notes engraved in your mind.
- When somebody asks you a simple question, you reply with a essay.
- When somebody asks you a question, you first ask how many marks it is.
- There are few books you haven't read.
- Fun? What is 'Fun'? I have vague memories...
- Your eyes are constantly moving back and forth even though there isn't a page of notes under your nose.
- Almost every room in your house is a "study".
- You wish you could be a book - revised edition.
- You can quote from the dictionary.
- When someone asks you for the time, you reply, "1819!"
- You still have dinner from three days ago lying on your table.
- You recite facts everywhere you go.
- You know the first 314 Pythagorean Triples.
- You cringe whenever somebody says the word "wrong".
That'll have to do for now. Good luck for your exams.
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