Monday, December 25, 2006

Christmas Time

[Quote of the post] Merry Christmas.
[Song of the post] All I want for Christmas is You - Various
[Other song of the post] Streets of London - Ralph McTell
[Poem of the post] The Christmas Wish

It's that time of year again. Christmas.

It's been another year. And once again I've read through the archives. The deterioration is evident. The soul; it is dying. Slowly, but surely, it is dying. It is losing the will to live.

Time. It is the basis of existence. It just keeps on running and running on and nothing can stop it. And it changes. It changes things, ideas, people. The strong, those that succeed, they are not fazed by change. The weak, they fall.

I do not like myself. Although everyone else thinks that I'm better than them. That I have things they don't. That after they have something, they cannot be content with it, and always see what other people have that they don't. Whoops, I'm talking about myself again.

One can argue that without this discontent mankind would have never reached past a million years of existence. And here we are today. Progressively moving forward because we cannot be content with what we have.

I do not want to get older. I see no benefits. I see no purpose. In short, I am afraid of change. For what has been done, is comfortable. And I like it, I do not wish to move from it, into the unknown, into that which all humans fear.

My mind is matured. Advanced for a fifteen-year-old. Unsuitable for a child's soul. I do no want to grow up. I want to be a kid forever.

When you're young, you can hug your best friend. When you're and adult, you're gay.
When you're young, you have imagination. When you're an adult, it's called computer-game-addiction.
When you're young, it's called creativity. When you're an adult, if it's not making money, it's a waste of time.
When you're young and you say something, you're observant. When you're old and you say something, you're identified as an opposition member.

Time is changing the world. Time is changing me. My mind is coming to terms with my physical age. I have often felt the urge to do something that I wasn't supposed to, but it has never been this strong. Not the sort of bad things you're thinking about, but things that you're not supposed to do according to what society says. It urges me to do what I feel, not think, is right. Even if it is unconventional.

Convention. Procedure. Beurocracy. One of the reasons that mankind has perpetuated itself is because it broke free of the constraints of tradition. We have a word for it. It's called pioneering. People are not weird, or strange. They're pioneers. They're doing what all you other people are scared of even trying.

As I look back into my archives, I realize that one of my questions is still unanswered. It you click the link at the top of this post it will direct you to a poem I wrote last Christmas. I asked a question in that post. If you had one Christmas wish, what would you wish for. I want to answer this. Someone. Everyone. Whoever chances upon this and reads this question, ask youself, what would you wish for. Then, please, honestly as you can, tell me what it is. Give me a reason to live. It may be the most important Christmas gift you have ever given.

The year comes to a close again. Time is lost, forever. The only way, is forward.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.

Friday, December 15, 2006

Dream Sequence #001

[Song of the post] When a Man Loves A Woman - Percy Sledge

I just woke up, and I had this amazing dream that I don't want to forget.

Okay, I was late for school (for some reason I can't remember). I dunno why but the assembly place was smaller, made of older wood, and had a piano in front. (The location keeps changing through the dream.)

Then, while I was sneaking through the back (don't know why too), the National Anthem started. So I dropped my bag (and for some reason put my fist on my chest o_O) and started singing... but after the first verse it became a hip-hop tune! So there was this funky music and I remember Shaun was there although I can't remember why o_O And then Boey and Zhang were dancing SWING O_O HAHAHAHA It was so cool. And Tucky was there! He was playing a trumpet at unimaginable speeds. O_o

Then the song ended. So I dumped my bag with Shuan (who was sitting in front) and was about to sneak around to the back of the class, using a path that took me outside the auditorium. Then SUDDENLY Mr. Quek starts singing When a Man Loves A Woman...! O_O So I rush back to the front and plonk myself down; he was singing it was cool Elvis style - I turned around to ask Michael to play the song on the piano behind my teacher and find out that his head was totally shaved. O_O Then for some reason Bryan Ong goes up and starts one-fingering the melody. Then a whole bunch of people rush and start messing with the piano. Mr Quek turns around to scold them, and the dream ended. T_T

Dang, that was a cool dream.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006


“These people are not fit to live. No human on this planet is fit to live. Humanity has been lost since the day it was born.

“Especially persons like yourselves: liars, down to the last one. You speak of condemning murder. The whole world is guilty of murder! Every three seconds, a child in Africa dies of malnutrition. Every three seconds, the whole world is guilty of murder.

“You do not do anything to stop it. You do not do anything to help. Civilians are mugged in the streets, die freezing in Russia, and suffer from diseases such as AIDS. And yet you developed nations, with your bloody red tape and governmental procedures, you cannot reach them. Cannot help them.

“Your scientists are continuously discovering new knowledge, advancing technology. And what do they end up with? Developing weapons. Designing ways to kill each other faster, cleaner, more efficiently, and on a larger scale. The splitting of the atom was a scientific breakthrough. What did the scientists do with it? Make a bomb and destroy hundreds of thousands of innocent lives. Even your computer games, they promote violence and murder and war. Death and destruction is all you humans know about.

“And that is why I shall end it. End all human life. With this chemo-genetic detonator, I will wipe out the entire human race from the face of this planet.

“So says… the ANIHILIST!”

Precog from The Uprising
from the 2012 Series by Uncle Edna

Friday, December 01, 2006


[Quote of the post] Not music. Magic.
[Song of the post] All of them.

I just came back from the ACS Lights Camera Action: Celebrating 40 Years of Music Making concert. And once again, I felt kinda alone there. I guess I was hearing more than just the music.

This is obviously so cliche, but music isn't just about noise or performers or good sounds. It induces a feeling; something in people that causes emotion. That's what they all say. That's why good music can move people. That's why movies have musical themes.

But music is more than that. Music is also a story; a very melodious one. Classical music is the best example of this; instrumentals usually have more of a story than ones with lyrics. And it's so amazing; when I close my eyes during the Jurassic Park Theme, I can see the dinosaurs; during the Pirates of the Caribbean theme, I can see the ships, the pirates, Jack Sparrow...

And then just sitting in the centre of the parents who are just there to hear their son or daughter play, or the friends who came just for support... I had the feeling that nobody was really appreciating the music. In the end there was no shout of 'encore'.

So now I'm home, alone again, feeling just like I just came out of a lecture about British comedy, trying to find a song that can fix my empty heart. Sounds so poetic, but that's all I can feel right now.

Kinda ironic that I watched Happy Feet just this morning. Movies have this way of telling you that different is good. But different is just lonely in this real world. The songs are great though. And I'm tapdancing everywhere I go now.