Meta-Psychology

Like I said, I’ve started watching anime recently. I have to say, it’s a whole new style of storytelling. All this time I’ve been more exposed to western-type stories; but it’s not just the stories that are different. The characters, themes, and especially how love is portrayed, is completely different. Quite interesting, comparing the two.

I can only claim to have watched three series so far (only season one of The Melanchly of Haruhi Suzumiya but both Gatekeepers and Gatekeepers 21 so I guess that evens it out?), but they all have some similarities. Oh and 5 centimetres per second too but that’s not a series. Not really. I’m just wondering why all these people seem to be falling in love at like, sixteen (Akikan) or eighteen (Gatekeepers) or twenty (Love Hina). I mean, I’m already nineteen; AM I MISSING SOMETHING HERE? Sigh. Never mind. Maybe I need to go search up all those childhood sweethearts that I had. Oh wait. All-boy school. Sigh. NEVER MIND.

You know how you can learn so many different things from each story? Well the lesson I’ve learnt from anime is a very fundamental one:

NO GIRL WILL EVER BE OR ACT THAT CUTE IN REAL LIFE.

So I realized that the characters in anime will never act that way in real life, and then I guess I realized that people in stories – western or otherwise – will never act that way in real life. Or in another way of saying it, nobody in real life will act as “dramatically” as in a story.

Complementing this great epiphany is the week-long intensive OM session I had. So with all the acting and dramatization and creativity and stuff, I started wondering about this phenomenon. I guess going to all the university talks and being vaguely interested in courses in psychology doesn’t help. Perhaps I should call this meta-psychology, or maybe meta-social skills. So why don’t people act like characters in a story?

I understand that characters in a story have to act more dramatically, with the situations more contrived and coincidental. Actions (in movies and performances) have to be larger-than-life, which is strange, because isn’t art supposed to emulate life? We spin tales based on real-life experiences or observations; why don’t people act in that same way? Maybe it’s because imagination comes into play, and the observations have to be exaggerated to make it more prominent or believable. Or maybe we’re just not that good at observing human actions? But that can’t be true since the overly-dramatized kinds of actions are really obvious: shrugging means uncertainty or is a sign of passiveness; holding your hands behind your back and shuffling one foot while standing on the other means shyness or nervousness; and so on.

So why don’t people act like characters in a story? I think anime is the most exaggerated of the lot. Granted, I’ve not had a lot of experience or chances to observe girls who have a crush on a guy and are afraid of confessing (which always seems to be a major plot device of romantic anime for some reason), but I’m sure that they wouldn’t be that nervous with all those actions and body language (one fist under the chin, one on the hem of your skirt, with the obvious blush and downcast eyes).

It’s especially the “corny” feelings that seem to be attributed to being overly-dramatic or flamboyant or awkward. If you notice, our society is not conditioned to telling the truth; the people in anime seem to be able to say serious things or comforting things or emotional things at the drop of a hat. But in real life, in this society, I know a couple of people who have to hide their compliments behind insults or snide comments; or even feeling corny when giving words of comfort or telling something you truly feel. It’s so strange.

Of course, all this may just be because a) I naturally just don’t see all these things happing in real life, or b) I don’t have enough experience reading people’s emotions and body language to identify all these things in real life, or c) I’m looking at reality and trying to see fantasy but failing. So yeah.

I see stories,
The Edna Man

Codebreakers

So somehow my last selection of books from the library all happened to be about codes. It was quite interesting in a way; three different genres but all about a similar thing.

Kaimira: The Sky Village is my favourite of the three. It's a fascinating story about two different children on opposite sides of the world in another post-apocalyptic setting. But the story is actually very interesting. I love the whole idea of the beast/human/mek trinity and how humanity is somehow in the middle between the two other extremes, but it's not just the 'golden mean' but possibly a third aspect as well, so it's more like a triangle. And I'm freaking interested in the story now but it's book one of five and the other four haven't been published yet which is really really irritating since now I have to wait for it to come out. Sigh.

The Riddles of Epsilon was quite interesting. It's more supernatural fantasy, but the whole story is based on the codes and riddles which this girl finds in the stone cottage behind her house, which contains the solution to stop these freaky cultists from finishing some ritual about some cursed artifact. I found the riddles quite cryptic and fascinating, and the whole story was done really well, and it had a chronological quandary which can rival any comic book storyline I've ever read.

Finally the Jonah Wish trilogy: Thieves Like Us, The Aztec Code, and The Bloodline Cipher. Code-breaking action in a more modern setting, it's a story about a group of five youths who work for Nathaniel Coldhardt (what a name) as an elite team of thieves who specialize in stealing historical artifacts which are steeped in lore and superstition. It was a very well-executed series, and very thrilling, especially with good action sequences and a very intriguing plot.

I'll see what strange coincidental theme my next trip nets me.
The Edna Man

Nineteen

Today I listened to music until around 2am on my aunt's laptop. I woke up at ten. I played a bit of DotA. I went for lunch at Island Creamery's Burger Shack. I met Bryan and Juzzie at Serene Centre. I got a free scoop of ice-cream at Island Creamery. We bummed around the comics shop for a bit. Juzzie and I waited for the rain to stop so we could get home. I played a bit of Final Fantasy Tactics: Advance on my aunt's laptop. My family brought me out to dinner at this ramen place. After dinner I followed them as they walked around the riverside. When I got home, I ate some cake and came up with a few OM problems. Then I went to sleep.

Well. I guess they can't all be special.
The Edna Man

The Genius of Tim Minchin

Hi. Today we're here to talk about the genius of Tim Minchin. Warning, most of the content of this post is NSFW.

I'm going to call Tim Minchin a mixture of Jason Mraz and Weird Al Yankovic. He does novelty songs, but he's such a manipulator of the English language it's mind-boggling. And it's not just that, but his piano is some unidentifiable rock-and-roll/jazz-blues mix which sounds really awesome. It's satire, nice music and wordplay. What else could you want?

5. Some People Have It Worse Than I


Nice satire here, and a nice melody. His ending riff is quite exciting. And just listen to the content.

4. Rock and Roll Nerd


Starts with a ballad, and it shifts to a rap-rock hybrid thing. It's hilarious. Listen to the words, they are awesome.

3. Inflatable You


Another hilarious song, its rhymes are brilliant. VERY NSFW. I love the way he rhymes in this one.

2. So F**king Rock


Not much words in this one, but awesome music. I have always been a fan of the way you can start with one instrument then build up individual kinda-loops of each instrument and put them all together in an awesome melody. He says the f-word more than an army sergeant, so use headphones or turn down volume, but only into the middle of the song. His lip-syncing and actions are also really well done.

1. Prejudice


This one is (obviously) my favourite. Misdirection is not only used by magicians and con-artists, but man when comedians use it, it is freaking hilarious. And the wordplay: MAN. Channeling Mraz's spirit, or something. I mean, it's not only the rappers who can do it, right? Epic brilliant.

Because only a ginger can call another ginger 'ginger',
The Edna Man

Family Antimatters

I love my family. I love my parents.

So today I get a call from this modeling studio who scouted me last month and said they would like me to come down for an interview on Monday. Well, obviously I had no idea I looked this good, and I am actually quite excited about going for an interview and seeing what the modeling career is all about.

I tell my mom. And she immediately freaks out and switches to her high-pitched "what-the-hell-did-you-just-say?" voice. She freaked out because I told her the interview was at five and she doesn't understand why they "have to interview me at night". She freaked out because "This isn't for some audition or anything, right?" when I told her it was in interview. And she freaked out and asked me to bring a friend along because she asserted that these places are dubious.

I tell my dad. His first words: "Don't waste your time, lah."

I love having open-minded, supportive parents.

I'm sure if you had them, you'd love them too!
The Edna Man

The Existentialist and the Army

The major slowly put down the mugs of coffee and casually saluted the sergeant, who was standing ramrod straight and looked as though he could smash the table into two when his hand came down. “Rehatkan diri, soldier,” said the major, and the sergeant relaxed.

“Major Lee, you’re here to interrogate the prisoner?”

“Heard he was giving you a lot of trouble,” said the major, looking into the room through the one-way mirror. Though he was handcuffed to the chair, the prisoner seemed to be singing to himself, swinging his fingers and tapping his toes to the music only he could hear.

“Never seen a case like him, sir,” said the sergeant, folding his arms across his chest. “Worse than the worst street gangster we’ve recruited.”

The two soldiers stared at the prisoner for a moment. “Let me speak to him,” said Major Lee.

“It’s no use, sir,” said the sergeant, picking up the keys and moving towards the door. “He hasn’t cooperated with anyone below your rank, and there’s no reason to believe he’s going to start cooperating with you.”

“But you shoot all the bullets anyway,” said Major Lee, picking up the mugs, “hoping one of them hits.”

The door opened with a creak. Major Lee strode over to the other end of the table and set down his mugs again. The prisoner was still singing, though softer now, and he was eyeing the major with a mixture of apprehension and revulsion.

“Good evening, soldier,” said Major Lee.

“Do you know what’s worth fighting for?” sang the prisoner, ignoring him. “When it’s not worth dying for?”

“Shouldn’t you be asking yourself that?” asked the major, and the prisoner went silent immediately.

“Acknowledge the major!” shouted the sergeant suddenly, causing the prisoner to jump, but he kept silent and just eyed the major with a mixture of apprehension and curiosity.

“RECRUIT TAN, ACKNOWLEDGE THE MAJOR!” the sergeant roared. He was about to smack the prisoner’s head, when Major Lee held up his hand and said, “That’s enough, sergeant.”

The sergeant put his hand down slowly.

“Sergeant, I would like you to uncuff this soldier and leave the room, please.”

“But sir,” the sergeant protested, “the prisoner is supposed to be restrained at all times by regulation, and-”

“Sergeant,” said the Major lightly, “that is an order.”

The sergeant stared blankly for a moment, then bent down and unlocked the handcuffs binding the prisoner to his chair. Without a backward glance, he took the cuffs and retreated from the room.

The major was left with the prisoner, who was rubbing his wrists awkwardly, but still keeping an eye on the major.

“Here,” said Major Lee, sliding a mug over the tabletop. “This one is for you.” The prisoner glanced at the cup for a second, before locking his eyes back on the major’s.

“Don’t worry, it’s not poisoned,” said the major, taking a sip from his own.

Still watching the major cautiously, the prisoner slowly reached for the cup and took a sip. Realizing it was only lukewarm, he drained it in one.

Once the prisoner wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, the major spoke. “So, why are you here, soldier?”

The prisoner snorted. “Soldier? I’m in training. I’m no soldier.” He reached between the lapels of his shirt and pulled out something on a ball chain. “See this? These are my identification tags. They’re not dog tags. I’m a recruit. Lower than a dog.” He let the chain drop onto the front of his shirt. “That’s the first thing I learned here.”

“You’re more valuable than you think,” said Major Lee. “You’re training to become a soldier.”

“What is this, good cop, bad cop?” asked the prisoner, running his hand across his shaved head. “Maybe I should work toward something more in my reach first, like, maybe, I don’t know, the canine unit?” he said sarcastically.

The major did not respond, but stared at the prisoner for a while. He opened a file which was on the desk. “So, Recruit John Paul Tan Shuo Ren,” he said, reading from the notes inside, “you haven’t answered my question.” He looked up. “Why are you here?”

“I know what I’m fighting for,” said Recruit Tan, and a shadow flickered across his eyes as he added, “and I think it may be worth dying for.”

“What was that?” asked Major Lee, looking puzzled.

“That was the answer to your question. Your very first question. ‘Shouldn’t you be asking yourself that?’ That question.”

“Ah,” said the major, remembering the lyrics that the prisoner was singing as he entered the room. “So, what are you fighting for?”

The prisoner gave him a long, hard stare, before replying a single word: “Freedom.”

Major Lee was slightly put off by this answer. “Well, it’s a good thing you are in the army, because that is exactly what we are fighting for. To protect the freedom of our nation and safeguard our-”

“Save the speech,” interrupted the prisoner. “I’ve heard it six times from six different officers of six different ranks before you came along. And anyway, that’s not the type of freedom I was talking about.”

The major smiled. “Don’t you think that’s worth protecting? Don’t you think that the freedom of this nation is something worth fighting for? Don’t you think-”

“I’m sorry,” interrupted the prisoner again, “was I supposed to think? To actually use my brain and think? Because I thought I was in the army. A recruit in the army doesn’t think.”

“That’s not true,” said the major again. “We’re currently developing the holistic army, with soldiers that think for themselves in battle situations and-”

“Yeah, that’s why the sergeant had to blindly follow your order when you told him to uncuff me,” the prisoner said sarcastically. “Because he could think about it.”

The two men stared at each other in silence. Finally the major gave in. “Look, I’m not here to discuss army regulations. I’m here about your arrest. It says here in your arrest report that you were apprehended for five counts of subordination, one count of desertion and three counts of cowardice.” The prisoner was silent. “It also says here that you physically assaulted your commanding officer. Why did you do that?”

“I got irritated with his swearing,” replied the prisoner.

“Swearing? You mean profanities? Why didn’t you report it to your officer in command?”

“Sure, because he doesn’t swear like a sailor in an R21 movie.”

“That doesn’t mean you can just punch your officer like that,” said the major.

“Actually, I think I can,” said the prisoner. “It’s really easy. I just lift up my hand, like so” - he raised his right arm to demonstrate - “and clench it into a fist” - he did so - “and draw it back and punch-”

“That isn’t what I meant,” said the major, his calm demeanor belying a more worried soul. “You can’t do it because there are rules and laws in place and-”

“Technically, the rules and laws only enforce consequences for your actions,” the prisoner said, tapping his fingers on the table. “There is nothing stopping you from breaking every rule and law in existence, if you were not worried about the consequences.”

The major stared at the recruit, not believing that someone could be this remorseless. “So you are not afraid of imprisonment? Of being behind bars for the rest of your life?”

“It is not my choice to be afraid. I can choose not to be afraid, so I cannot fear.”

“What?” asked the major.

“Look, Major-” the prisoner stared at the nametag above the major’s breast pocket - “uh, Lee,” the prisoner began, then stopped. “Do you have another name? A first name? Or a Chinese name? Because I cannot call you ‘Major Lee’. It’s too hilarious.”

The major looked at the prisoner, wondering if he could reveal his full name. Then he said, “My first name is Percy.”

“Right, Percy.” The prisoner leaned back in his chair, resting his head in his hands. “You’re different from all the other officers who have come in to interview me. You’re smarter. A little bit. And less prone to shouting and violent behaviour. That’s good. That’s interesting. That’s why I’m actually talking to you.”

The prisoner leaned forward in his chair and fixed his eyes on the major. “What do you know about existentialism?”

“Not much,” confessed the major. “Never did follow philosophy.”

“It’s a philosophical idea,” said the prisoner, “which denounces the meaning of human life. No,” he said, seeing the look of worry which slipped across the major’s expression, “I don’t mean that life is not valuable. I’m not a murderer. Existentialism says that there is no intrinsic meaning in life. Life has only as much meaning as what we put into it. We chart our own course, we choose our own destiny, we make our own lives meaningful.

“So the central idea of existentialism is choice. We can choose to do anything. For instance, I can choose to get up, take this chair and bludgeon you to death. I won’t do it; the thought of murder disgusts me. But I could do it, you see? There is no one stopping me from doing it but myself.

“That’s what I realized yesterday, after doing about a million push-ups in the scorching sun on the blazing gravel, being shouted at and verbally abused, being physically and mentally tortured. I realized that it was not the officers, or the sergeants or anyone more senior than me who was abusing, torturing me. I was torturing me. I was the one following them. I was the one listening to them. I was the one who was carrying out their every command. I realized I didn’t have to. I realized I could choose to stop at any time. So I did.

“They had us on the ground again, in the middle of the night. To hell with the ‘seven hours of uninterrupted rest’, right? So I told myself, enough is enough. I chose to recover prematurely. I left my squad and went back to my bunk. Of course they shouted at me. But what can they do?

“So here I am. Because I realized that I didn’t have to listen to your commands or follow your orders. You can arrest me, imprison me, throw me behind bars, execute me. That is your choice. But you can’t make me go back to the physical and mental torture. You can’t make me do anything.

“That is my choice.”

-----
It might be a little contrived. But it's a story. The Major's full name is Percy Lee Sun Tzu, Percy being a reference to General Arthur Percival, General Commanding Officer of Malaya during World War II, and of course Sun Tzu and his Art of War. John Paul is a reference to Jean-Paul Sartre and Shuo Ren is a reference to Søren Kierkegaard, both major figures in existentialism. The song lyrics is from 21 Guns by Green Day. Most of this is pieced together from army stories from people I know.

Well, it's just an idea I had. I realize I can't really make my characters sound non-western, probably because I read too much.

I'm only fear that I lose control of myself.
The Edna Man

A Whole Life So Lonely

It's a week after Chinese New Year. The most exciting thing that happened this year is that it became a Tiger year. My little nieces are really cute. I tried to spread the love of Bartok, but to no avail. Maybe next week. No prawn crackers this year, sigh.

The more physical and obvious aftereffects of Love Hina has worn off, I think. But there's still a lot of undercurrent, I feel. Like a friend told me, something about the story echoed with my soul. Maybe I'll carry it from now on, wherever I go. I just have to make sure I don't set any standards.

I watched The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzimiya, which I was led to through the ending theme, which is really nice. Unfortunately, I fail to get what is so awesome about it. Must be taste I guess. But I love the cinematography and I loved the epic space simulation game. That was hilarious. I fear that I might be slowly turning otaku. I am interested in learning Japanese now.

I also finished reading the first Maximum Ride trilogy, the one that Daniel bought in the US and I borrowed to read on the train rides. I read the fourth book and find out that there's a second trilogy, with the sixth book not released yet. Graah. Now I have to wait again.

Speaking about fictional characters blogging in real life, Hui Jun has started a blog by his new character. I am interested in seeing how it turns out. I am also interested in seeing if I can fit TNN into it somehow. Isn't it strange that it's been four years since Naphtali but we still all remember it as TNN?

OM has started again. I feel so rusty, even though it's my third time doing it. Some people change, and some people don't. And some things don't either. I'm always meeting new people I can never keep track of. Oh well. There's a new coach called Tess, who was in RGS's Players, and I guess her acting is pretty good, but I don't think she's done much spontaneous. Will have to wait two weeks to see. It feels good acting up again.

Life is really boring when everyone is at camp. I got my letter on Chinese New Year, going in April 12th.

Then you come and ease the pain,
The Edna Man

Love and Hope

Today, I just finished reading a manga.

It's kinda weird... I never read much manga before. I'm not as otaku as a lot of people I know. Bryan first got me with The Legend of Koizumi last month. It's in that kinda of weird-awesome-completely-"badass"-kind of comedy genre, but I guess it's good for a laugh.

Today, I just finished reading Love Hina.

Have you ever liked a story enough to throw yourself into it? To devote your entire soul to the characters, the plot... what will happen, what happens in the end? That you come to care so much about people... who aren't actually real?

People laugh when they say I want to become a writer. They say that being a novelist is not a survival ambition in this country I live in. Either that, or they go the technical way and think "speechwriting" or "journalist". Nobody appreciates the value of a good, powerful story.

Right now, my arms and hands are numb. My feet are numb. There's a weird feeling in the pit of my stomach. I'm kinda sweaty, and there's a feeling like there's something constricting my diaphragm.

Is this love? Or loneliness?

Love Hina is a manga of the harem genre. Simply put, harem mangas usually have one male lead character surrounded by a supporting case of female characters (or vice versa, as in with the genders reversed). It's also notorious for showing lots of ecchi fan-service, but I'll let you google that for yourself. It's also a comedy, and sometimes, the exaggeration gets kinda funny.

But that's not the reason I feel like this now.

Sure, it may be a harem manga. Sure, it may be an ecchi comedy. Sure, many people don't like it because it's unrealistic. It's just a story after all.

But it's a story about life. A story about people, and the things they do. It's a story about relationships. Friends and family. About courage, romance, and improvement. About the weird things people do when they like someone else. Most of all, at its core, it's a story. A story about love.

And that Gives Me Hope.
The Edna Man

Stop: Storage Time!

Melbourne, Australia -- Don't you just hate it when you're late for a meeting but the multistorey carpark is full, then vowing to be early next time so you can get a parking space, but never do?

Drivers would be delighted to find out that Seah Industries has solved the problem of limited parking space. Utilizing their groundbreaking time-travelling technology which they unveiled just last year in August 2012, Seah Industries has managed to commercialize the time-travel phenomenon.

Dubbed ChronoParking, the new system takes advantage of time, instead of space, in modern parking lots. "Carparks are always full during peak periods and usually empty after hours," said a spokesperson for Seah Industries at a press conference yesterday. "ChronoParking merely sends cars into empty parking lots in the past or future, allowing carparks to hold 'more than their capacity', allowing patrons to spend less time driving around looking for parking space."

Time travel has been a subject of controversy since its discovery in July 2012, when Seah Industries co-founder Dr. Jarrel Seah, then only 21, invented the first time machine and proved the existence of parallel universes. Since then, many advocate groups and government organizations have suggested that time travel should not be commercialized, lest it "falls into the wrong hands and history changes forever", according to the mission statement of Singularity, a non-profit organization which advocates against the proliferation of time travel.

Nevertheless, Seah Industries is confident with its new system. "A lot of safety measures are in place to ensure that history does not get rewritten," said Dr. Levin Tan, Seah Industries' leading scientist in the area of time travel. "For instance, the system preferably sends vehicles into a future timeline, when the interactions of cause and effect should be minimal on our present." Other measures include bomb-detection scanners and a ChronoShield plating around each parking space, to minimize the radiation of time particles called "minuteons", which can play havoc with the timestream.

"Imagine the future," said Dr. Tan, "where cars can be diverted to the same road at a different time to ease rush hour congestion." He adds, "This technology is the future, and also the past, and present."

----------

Inspired by rush hour carparking at Anchorpoint and Ikea yesterday. Set in the TNN 2012 universe.

The Edna Man

When The Saints Go Marching In

It's been a while, hasn't it? It seems so long ago that we got our IB scores, and finishing exams seems even further back in time. So many things have happened in these two months: playing mahjong, Christmas parties, happy outings, games, The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, getting sick, getting downgraded.

And so now here we are. Bordering on the edge next scheduled life event which will bring people closer while also tearing them apart. After this, there's no more holidays. No specific time set aside for the so-called "less important" things in life. Everyone on their own path in life, not knowing when they will converge again with the paths of the people who they have walked with for the earliest parts of their lives.

By Thursday, so many people will have gone in. And after Friday, my MSN list will drop to less than half. What will I do then? When everybody's gone, what will you do? I am suddenly reminded of the Left Behind series, which is about the events immediately following the biblical Rapture, and I get the feeling that it won't be so different in three day's time.

Have you ever wondered if you were not designed for this world? That you like doing things that the world deems unimportant; and those that the world wants you to do, you don't like doing? Haven't you seen people who seem to just fit in to the expectations of society, who love being doctors and lawyers and engineers, who love making money and creating businesses and organizations and making more money?

Oh Lord I want to be among the number,
The Edna Man

Less Than 45

Less Than 45 parody of 1985 by Bowling for Soup

Woohoohoo
Woohoohoo

Debbie just hit the wall
She thought she had it all
Great World Lit essay
Excellent TOK
Her dreams went out the door
When she received her score
Only got forty-two
What is she gonna do?

She was gonna be an doctor
She was gonna go real far
She was gonna be a judge
Or maybe a superstar
Prestigous scholarships
Now look like comic strips
Looks at her average points
And wonders how she'll apply for

John Hopkins, and Princeton,
Imperial College London
There was Cambridge, Trinity
And places still at MIT
Her parents share her stress
No point trying NUS
'Cause you can't, can't just apply
With less than, less than, less than 45

Woohoohoo
(Less than 45)
Woohoohoo

She’s done all the IAs
Footnotes every line
CAS, Mathematics
Every sine and cosine
She had interviews
Student Council through and through
Thought she’d get a shot
At something in a high paid slot

Where’s the scholarships and the invites?
Maybe she'd do better jumping from a great height
When did 'below forty' mean 'no degree'?
Whatever happened to offers, career fairs,
(All the millionaires from)

John Hopkins, and Princeton,
Imperial College London
There was Cambridge, Trinity
And places still at MIT
Her parents share her stress
No point trying NUS
'Cause you can't, can't just apply
With less than, less than, less than 45

Woohoohoo

She's crying in the dark
Thinking of the cash she needs to re-mark (Re-mark)
And now lowering becomes a factor
I guess it's time, time
Time!
To give up

Hopkins, and Princeton,
Imperial College London
There was Cambridge, Trinity
And places still at MIT
Her parents share her stress
No point trying NUS
'Cause you can't, can't just apply
With less than, less than, less than 45

Woohoohoo

John Hopkins, and Princeton,
Imperial College London
There was Cambridge, Trinity
And places still at MIT
Her parents share her stress
No point trying NUS
'Cause you can't, can't just apply
With less than, less than, less than 45

----------
Just in case, you know, for disclaimer's sake, this is supposed to be a satire, so preemptive thanks for all the comments about how this is unrealistic, but yeah, I know. And the name 'Debbie' I kept from the real song, so any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely coincidental, etc etc.

On the Brink of Success or Failure

This is it. Tomorrow is the day. Judgment day. Hours of planning, days of meticulous hard work, it all comes down to tomorrow. One way or the other, the result will be success, or failure. Either way, it was fun while it lasted, and I guess I have no regrets.

Sometimes I wonder why I chose to do this. It was a big decision, full of possible repercussions, least of all was tomorrow's. But it is done, and as I sit here writing this, full of anticipation of the events to come, I realize that there is no turning back. I can't just give it all up and fail to appear tomorrow. So many people have stakes in this, and I think they'd want to see how it turns out in the end.

Maybe it would be best if there were instructions on how to deal with this kind of thing. Like a handbook, which would guide you through the process a step at a time, helping you along your path. That would be nice. But it wouldn't fit into the bag.

For those in the know, you probably would have gotten it by now.
The Edna Man

Beep beep boop bap beep beep

And so, with a simple sound, I realize that I am now a man.

From a boop-boop to a bip. How far I have traveled, eighteen years and I now pay adult fare.

It brings it all on to you. It's a quarter-life crisis. You're now one of them. You're now supposed to be one of them.

What if I don't want to? What if I go kicking and screaming?

Because I can never grow up. Not into this world. I'm not like other people.

Don't kill a child. You can't kill a child.

This world can.
The Edna Man

Different

From here.

Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can praise them, disagree with them, quote them, disbelieve them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things. They invent. They imagine. They heal. They explore. They create. They inspire. They push the human race forward. Maybe they have to be crazy. How else can you stare at an empty canvas and see a work of art? Or sit in silence and hear a song that’s never been written? Or gaze at a red planet and see a laboratory on wheels? We make tools for these kinds of people. While some see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.

Some of you may recognise that as the famous Apple ‘Think Different’ text, others may not, but I guess whether you’ve read it before or have read it for the first time there, we can pretty much all agree that it’s an inspiring piece of text. The thing that surprised me was that when reading through it I realised that all you need to do is change one tiny piece of the text to change the whole context of it.

“We make tools for educate these kinds of people”

In my mind, that’s now one hell of a motto for a better education system.

Let’s face it; the current education system just doesn’t know how to handle these kinds of people. “The round pegs in the square holes,” as Apple refers to them. The system doesn’t understand creativity. It robs all students of their creative consciousness and replaces it with structure, structure, and more structure, only to prepare them for a 9-to-5 job, Monday to Friday, every week of every year for the rest of their lives. Art, Music, Drama… you name it, the current system has a course for it. But that course doesn’t do any form of justice to the many greats that have over hundreds of years created amazing works and done incredible things, demonstrating how beautiful these arts can be. Students aren’t told to let passion drive them forward, or let their inspiration flow and their imagination stop at nothing. They are told to follow the rules, and do whatever it takes to get a ‘pass.’ Where would we be if Bach was told his Brandenburg concertos ‘didn’t quite meet the required standard’? What would have happened if Van Gogh was told his paintings just ‘didn’t make sense’?

It doesn’t stop at the arts. The suppression of creativity is seen in all fields of learning within the current system, giving no room for our real geniuses to shine. And why? Because the system has an obsession with testing, and at the end of the day you can’t test real genius, because you just can’t grade it. Who really has the right to say that a piece of music is an A or B or whatever else? Why should someone sitting in a fancy government office be able to sit there and write the rules that decide whether this piece of writing would make the grade or not? Why can’t the people deciding our futures for us be content with having some classes that have no exams? Classes that are solely there to help stimulate the different skills we all possess, without having to put us under the constant pressure of being bombarded with test after test and grade after grade. Do they see this as ‘non-educational’?

Think of the wealth of talent that is being and has been squandered due to this system. How many people would have become the next great composer if they had been given just that little bit more leeway? How many people would have had the courage to write their own novel, because they wouldn’t have been told they ‘weren’t good enough’? How many people failed to ever recognise their own potential because they were too busy striving for the best grades possible? Only so they could get a ‘good’ job in an office, with a ‘good’ salary.

Don’t get me wrong, we need the people in offices to do the things that keep our public services running and our economy going, but we also need the people who create, invent, and change things. We need the people who “sit in silence and hear a song that’s never been written,” because Apple is right; they push the human race forward, and have done for as long as the human race has been around. But they can’t continue to do so if we don’t help them realise they are capable of doing so. They can’t invent the cure for cancer, or compose a great symphony, or write a magnificent piece of literature if our education system tells them exactly how everything should be, and what they should learn, and what they are aiming to do with their lives. Give them the opportunity. Let them decide.

We make the mistake of thinking that the people that do well in school are the ‘smart’ ones, but that isn’t always the case. These people may just be good at retaining information and reciting it back under pressure, or may just be good at problem solving. Our schools teach these kinds of people well, because they know how to deal with them. All you need to do with these people is throw facts and figures at them and tell them they need to know them to pass, and get become qualified to get a good job... which is not even proper learning. There is no regard there for our creative ones, or even the ‘smart’ ones who can probably do so much more given the opportunity. There is no other option, no fork in the road, not even a way to have the best of both worlds. Just one path for everyone to follow, with the same goal in mind—to fit in, and become another round peg in a round hole.

Let me make myself clear right now that this is not a dig at teachers, who do a superb job. What it is, however, is a cry out to the people in suits who decide what we learn and how we learn it to change their philosophy. To realise that some people can achieve more, and that the people who will eventually find the cure for cancer, or create the next breakthrough piece of technology, or discover new planets and galaxies are in our schools. These children/students or whatever you want to call them are waiting on these people to realise and do something to help them on their way to greatness. To give them the opportunity to shine, and achieve things that both us and them can’t even imagine yet.

It really is time for our education system to start ‘Thinking Differently.’

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What do you wanna be when you blow up?
The Edna Man

Top Ten of 2009

Hey! 2009's almost over, and instead of griping over the past and wishing for a better future, I'm going to start this annual thing which recaps my best moments of each year, with the hope that they will be just as scintillating in the years to come! It's written in bits and pieces over the year, starting in June, but next year I'll start from the very beginning (Do, re, mi!).

1. Odyssey of the Mind Coaching: 2009 (Written: 16 Jun 09)
Ahahaha... no surprises that this would be on the list! Possibly one of the best experiences of this life or any other lives I had, have, or will ever have. I really had fun meeting all these new friends, and acting is a real blast, no matter what anybody says or calls me. I think possibly the best is the actual day of the national competition, and especially the prize ceremony, because I was on tenterhooks (wow, I actually used an obscure word) the whole time and it is AWESOME to jump up on your seat while cheering your voice out when one of the teams wins. Sad that World Finals was cancelled though. Meh. AH WELL STILL A HAPPY MEMORY!

2. The "Brack Obama" Joke (Written: 21 June 2009)
Oh yeah this one was a classic. Well, I was sitting on that joke for days, but with no opportunity to use it (is this how all comedians feel?). So there I was, sitting in an English class about Hedda Gabler, and wouldn't you know it, Ms Rachel Cheung asks me to read the stage directions about the first appearance of Brack. Talk about timing! Without skipping a beat, I instantly said, "Who, Obama?" and while it didn't get hilarious laughs, it triggered the standard eye-rolling response, so I guess it was good. And hey, I didn't get to waste a good joke.

3. Biking for the Second Time (Written: 21 June 2009)
Last week I went biking for the second time in my life. As I mentioned in that post, I think it was great that remembered how to do it the second time. Nothing like biking on speed! Now all I need to do is train more then we (most probably just I) will be able to rocket all the way up to Russia and back! Woohoo!

4. Finishing v3.0 of Don't Forget the Lyrics! Powerpoint version (Written: 21st June 2009)
This was thrilling enough, considering I finished everything happily at 3am in the morning. The high was absolutely fantastic, and I couldn't sleep for an hour after that. It's really satisfying once everything falls into place, and all the code that you spent hours searching for FINALLY WORKS. Then I made the Interactive Tutorial, which was quite fun as well, and right now I think the whole thing is just brilliant!

5. Animusic! (Written: 31st December 2009)
Oh man, if you still don't know what Animusic is, man you are missing out. Search it on Youtube. It's an awesome visual and aural treat that will leave you breathless. When I first found out about it, I couldn't stop spreading it around, because it was so awesome. Acoustic Curves and the Pipe Dreams are my favourites, and Future Retro is nice too.

6. The Giant Porcupine Sighting (Written: 31st December 2009)
OH MAN THIS IS A GREAT STORY. So I was on the bus with Hui Jun going home after school when the 74 stops at the Sunset Way bus stop. We were sitting on the upper deck and so the roof of the bus shelter blocks most of the view of the pavement. Anyway behind the roof someone was carrying one of those spiky brooms over his shoulder, so only the brush was visible. So Hui Jun gets distracted in the middle of our conversation, stares out the window and goes, "Oh my god it's a giant porcupine." So obviously, I crack up. And after I've composed myself, and able to breathe again, I ask him, "Why did you think that was a giant porcupine?" And he goes, "I dunno! I mean, at first I thought 'lion' but I knew lions don't live in Singapore!" And then I just crack up again.

7. GEP Chalet (Written: 31st December 2009)
Ahh, chalet. I missed last year's for WoW, so I came back this year with a vengeance. (Well, no, not really.) Between barbecuing with David and watching Fatal Frame for the first time in my life (FREAKING SCARY AND DISTURBING), it was loads of fun. I also got to try a bit of Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2, which was quite interesting.

8. Movies: Avatar and Up (Written: 31st December 2009)
Avatar was my movie event of the year. Transformers was action-packed and had interesting graphics, but this one had a whole WORLD. I really love the imagination and detail the creators put into it. It was a spellbinding totally-worth-it of 161 minutes. And Up was nice too, a nice little family movie which was heartwarming and generally awesome Pixar. Kevin's a girl?

9. Prom Night (Written: 31st December 2009)
Technically, prom itself wasn't that fun. It's for famous people to rub elbows with other famous people and not much for an inconspicuous guy like myself to do. I liked my costume though. It's the first (full) costume I ever had, if you discount those I had in OM which didn't really look like the real thing. No, the real fun was before and after prom, where we crashed in a sweet suite Ernest('s mom) booked at Raffles Town Club. I rarely get to play platform games, so it was lots of fun.

10. Youtube (Written: 31st December 2009)
It's not Youtube exactly, but all the awesome things that are there. Instrumentals for karaoke, for example, and also the Onion News Network, which is freaking hilarious. Other memorable Youtube moments this year include Improv Everywhere's many musicals, which are always awesome whenever they appear, and The Spectacular Spiderman which is the best Spiderman TV series ever made so far.

It's gonna be a happy new year!
The Edna Man

Judgment

Can you feel it? Can you feel the judgment?

They should be done by now. All over the world, they should be done by now. There's only one week left. It's all over. You have been judged. Can you feel your whole life, the rest of your future, hinging on a simple, single, two-digit number?

This is as close to Fate as it gets. From now till then, there's no changing anything. The score is fixed, the die is cast. One might say that it has already been since you wrote that final answer. But people are fickle and unpredictable, and only when the ticks and crosses are all tallied, then your fate is cast in stone.

Can you imagine knowing it now? Seven days before the day of reckoning. All you need to do is find those that belong to you, and add them up yourself. You don't need a ceremony to reveal the verdict. You have already been judged. It all exists. You just don't know it yet.

It's all there. One way or the other, you've already been acquitted or condemned. Right now, your life has swung into one of the two paths, one of the two categories, one of the two compartmentalized boxes. Right here, right now. It has already been decided. There is no turning back.

Can you feel it? Can you feel the weight of the future crushing your soul and rending your consciousness, strangling your hopes and dreams and ambitions by festering in your anticipation and feeding on your worries before it threatens to burst out and consume your every nightmare...

And then you wonder, why?
The Edna Man

Avatar Runemarks

It's past 1 a.m. and I just got home and my parents aren't killing me. I feel old.

I just got home watching Avatar and it was awesome. I love the world, and I loved how the visual effects really brought out the world of Pandora. Missed the opening minutes though, so I'm not sure if Pandora is on another planet or an alternate dimension or what. I'm guessing planet. I thought the helicopter-lizards were quite cool. Oh, and I don't really understand the biological or evolutionary advantages of moss luminescing with applied pressure. Wouldn't that just attract predators (or herbivores)? But the effects were awesome, really loved the glowing mushrooms and the Tree of Souls. Interesting ecosystem there, interesting world. I wouldn't mind watching it again. Oh and since the movie ended past midnight, it was a race against time to the MRT station to see if we could catch the last train, and another race to the bus stops to catch the last bus, frantically scanning the large maps along the way. I felt rather Bourne-ish as I was doing that. Quite an exciting little adventure.

A couple days ago I finished reading Runemarks by Joanne Harris, and before that, Here Lies Arthur by Philip Reeve. Awesome books, awesome storytelling. A peculiar connection between these two books is that they are (possibly) meta-commentaries about stories in general. Actually, Reeve's book probably had more of it. Here Lies Arthur is a tale about King Arthur, Lord of the Britons. Except this wasn't the honourable Arthur from legends; he was nothing more than a gang boss, offering protection from the Saxons to the settlements scattered across Britain and demanding protection money in return. And the stories of Arthur's good name was spread by his trickster and bard, Myrrdin (sound familiar?). I knew enough about the legend of King Arthur to know that this was an excellent story. You have a well-known tale and you subvert it using easily-recognizable characters in a whole new setting (much like Marvel: 1602).
There was an undercurrent of tricksters in Runemarks as well, with Loki. Another book with the same vein, and another brilliant world with excellent storytelling. The only thing I found annoying was that the author didn't really focus on the "main" character throughout the whole thing, but it was possibly due to the type of story the author intended to write. Still good though.

The other medium I have recently discovered is The Onion News Network. It is HILARIOUS. I love the subversion, and I absolutely love the way they do it so professionally and so deadpan. It is brilliant. What it must be to work there.

"That's what we need. Another bloody oracle."
The Edna Man.

Dream Sequence #004

Okay, I just woke up, and I need to write down this dream.

I don't remember much now that I'm awake, and there was a whole blockbuster's worth of material in this dream. Basically, there is this land with two races, I think, a more human-ish one and a more elvish one. At least, I assume elvish because they wear more green and leaves than the other race. They use bows and arrows, but the main character (first person point of view) is learning a form of exaggerated martial arts where you have colourful bolts of energy flying around whenever you perform a movement. He learns it from a master, who he develops a powerful relationship with. If I remember correctly, both are elvish, because it makes whatever comes next have a lot of sense. Then something happens, something about an enemy inviding, and I think they have to flee to the shelter of the nearby fort. I remember clearly that the fort had a postern gate, carved out of rock in the side of a mountain.

Once in the fort, the protagonist and his master are able to train in the royal swimming pool, which is supposed to have benefits which I can't remember. (The extra spinning ability, perhaps. There was this bit I remember where the protagonish spun around, crossing his hands in front and behind him as he went, launching energy bolts shaped like small blue or yellow birds at his teacher, while he blocked them with a red ring of energy around himself.) The royalty, the king, has this thundercloud floating over his head, with lightning striking occasionally, and the prince has a smaller cloud, shaped like a leafy sea dragon. Again something happens, which I can't remember, and the humans have little trust for the elves, and one of them in particular is extremely bowstring-happy, willing to shoot anyone whom he thinks has turned traitor (and he thinks most elves have). So anyway the master is showing the protagonist a map of the whereabouts of his family, which he needs to go back and protect, when there is this cinematographic zoom-in of the trigger-happy soldier snapping his face backwards upon hearing the name of the village, and then the protagonist goes up to him and demands to know why hie is eavesdropping on the conversation. They almost fight, but are stopped by the image of an elf leaving by the postern, which if I failed to mention before, is carved into the mountain and is about ten metres tall. So the guy promptly draws his bow, and the protagonist tries to stop him, and he promptly gets shot in the side like, four times. And if you recall, it was all in first-person, so technically I got shot in the side like, four times. And it was helluva painful. I think I stumbled backwards into a pit, and that's when I woke up.

I have a feeling that this dream was inspired by Marvel: 1602, Xi Min and JX's new fantasy world, and The Two Towers soundtrack, all combined. Creepy.

The Edna Man

Marvel: 1602

So I just came back from the National Library today feeling extremely happy since I discovered that my premium membership only expires in four days which meant that I could borrow an unhealthy number of books home. Sad that they discontinued their double-limit policy though.

Anyhoo, the first of my eight-book spree is Marvel: 1602, written by Neil Gaiman of Sandman and Stardust fame, as well as a number of other titles which I am not familiar with. And I have to agree that Gaiman is a kind of storytelling genius. I now am very willing to read Sandman.

The story is interesting, though after a couple of years reading comics, is somewhat typical of the genre. The way Gaiman crafts it, though, weaving fundamental and recognizable Marvel characters into the historical setting, is pure brilliance. I had great fun identifying the people before the plot revealed their names and identities, and it was fun waiting for Peter Parker to get bitten by a spider (screw you, Gaiman, for drawing that out for so long XD). It was good, good, good, and I enjoyed it so much, so thanks Mr Gaiman, for an hour of entertainment and a lifetime of inspiration.

"A universe in which no story can ever truly end; in which there can be only continuances." -- Richard Reed
The Edna Man

Prom Birthday Chalet Musical 3

You can tell how much I've been playing by the huge delay between posts. So anyway there's been much going on. Going in order:

Prom was a blast on the 23rd of November. The Phantom of the Opera Was Here, inside my mind. Pity there wasn't any chandeliers to crash into the middle of the ballroom, sigh. Oh, and it doesn't matter how awesome you are, if you're not famous, screw it. But still, it was nice playing the Phantom and having a cloak to swish around and draw around you dramatically as you leave the room and stuff. But I guess the Phantom must have been left handed or something, because it's damn hard to eat with that mask on. (Or maybe he takes it off. Oh yeah.) Anyway, was one of the only few people with a mask, unless you count girls' eyeshadow, which was WAY FREAKY and looked so gothic and vampish. But well. Never understood them anyway. Ernest had this awesome British costume thing with a pipe and hat and a suit which looked so close to a tuxedo that it was almost as if Mr Bond himself had entered the room. Hui Jun looked like Willy Wonka with his humongous top hat and cane and paedophilic mannerisms. Levin went as a mad scientist, with a Russian accent but he looked more Einstein-ish than Russian.

Prom itself wasn't very exhilarating. There were a couple of performances but the sound system wasn't good enough to carry it across the ballroom. No dancing. Food just came and went. Took some pictures, and went off to Raffles Town Club where Ernest had booked a suite. We had bowling earlier in the afternoon (I am thinking of learning how to do it properly) and played games through it mostly. It's quite fun playing Rise of Apocalypse with more people, but Lord of the Rings was DAMN HARD and DAMN STRESSFUL. But yeah, had much fun anyway.

And so I've been introduced to a new MMORPG. I tried BrightShadow right after exams ended, but I found it to be getting too monotonous after level 20 (I was a mage and had little late game variety). So after prom the guys got me into NeoSteam which I'm still playing now and am quite happy with it. It's great because it can run on my com, end of story.

Oh, midway between this and the next thing was double back-to-back birthdays of Juzzie and XM. Juzzie's was quite fun and I met a couple of new people I'll never see again, and XM's introduced me to Valkriya Chronicles which is an AWESOME Turn-Based Strat with a novel combat system. (As Jonny would agree, the main character is also quite cute.)

Well not long after that it was GEP CHALET which was an awesome blast. I missed the last one because of WoW last year, so this year I came back with a vengeance. I feel a bit guilty because I didn't help out as much, but I guess I helped out where I could. (Better that SOME PEOPLE who didn't help out at all!) But it was mostly a gaming chalet, with Borderlands in the bedrooms and PS3 in the hall and Starcraft matches as after-dinner entertainment. But I think the highlight of the many chalets is Fatal Frame, and this year I forced myself to stay awake to watch it. I can understand why it's such a communal game, as anyone playing it alone in the dead of night must either be insane or blindfolded. The game's creators do make the player freak out most of the times, and SZ was just hilarious to watch playing (Jew film!). But I admit that I wasn't really freaked out by the ghosts, but it was more of when the audience shrieked in terror that made me jump. But still, the plot of the game was quite disturbing, and the ritual was damn freaky. It still freaks me out whenever I think of the Blinding Mask and the Rope Maiden Ritual. Apparently, the next two Fatal Frame titles are even more freakier, because there's something about a twin strangling her sister and a whole village of undead. Yeah.

So that's been most of my activities for the past fortnight or two. Then Saturday I watched High School Musical 3: Senior Year and I LOVED IT. Okay, the plot stinks, quite badly. BUT THE MUSIC IS AWESOME. I can tell they really pulled out all the stops for the feature film, because the cinematography was just brilliant, and some of the sets and scenes were amazing. The Broadway style song, I Want It All, was stupendous, I think my favourite, because of the elaborate set and the costumes and the whole musical-ishness of the piece. Loved it, totally. Oh and then there was the awesome rotating corridor in Scream which I though was quite cool because it made it like a real music video. I think it would be awesome fun to be a cast member on a production like this.

And so that's all for now. I'll see what other awesome stuff I'll be doing these next two months of freedom.

Who says we have to let it go?
The Edna Man