Holding out for a Teacher

Holding Out for a Teacher - Parody of Holding Out for a Hero by Bonnie Tyler

Where have all the tutors gone?
And where are my textbooks?
Where's the stupid search engine
Telling me to look?
All these facts and figures are running through my brain
I need help to sort through my head before I go insane!

I need a teacher!
I'm holding out for a teacher till the end of the term;
He's gotta be smart
And she's gotta have heart
And he's gotta be friendly but firm
I need a teacher!
I'm holding out for a teacher so that I can learn
She's gotta be sure
As an entrepreneur
Or the finals and exams will burn
Exams will burn

Though this class ain't perfect
And it just gets on your nerve;
Idiots and geniuses,
Taken from both ends of the curve.
But ask yourself one question; ask your own true heart:
Would your life be better if we spent our year apart?

I need a teacher!
I'm holding out for a teacher 'till she marks my essay
Don't come into my dorm;
Sign my CAS form;
Don't tell me it's another survey?!
I need a teacher!
I'm holding out for a teacher until Teachers' Day!
Jarrel Seah can't explain,
His words are too arcane
And it leaves me in more disarray
More disarray

"Madam could you please write my testimonial?
I need to apply for Uni."
"No please don't confiscate my
MP3!"

Through the toilet breaks and long timetables
Fire drills without smoke
We will all study hard
So we can get your jokes

I need a teacher!
I'm holding out for a teacher who is also a friend,
Don't need no professor;
Or Internal Assessor;
Or someone who just condesceneds;
I need a teacher!
I'm holding out for a teacher who really comprehends
We gotta remember
'Cos the end of November
Doesn't mean that these friendships must end
Friendships must end

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My tribute to all my teachers, past and present. Happy Teachers' Day, y'all!

In other news, today's T-Day performance was one of the best EVER. I mean, I don't know how the older teachers are going to appreciate the hip-hop and stuff, but having the Senior Admin in feather boas and a sparkly top hat must surely make any performance an instant sellout.

Somebody give me a grade!
The Edna Man